Category Archives: Grand Slams
One, Seven, Seventeen
Wimbledon, Final (3) Federer d. (4) Murray, 4/6 7/5 6/3 6/4 The most pressing issue facing anyone determined to talk about Roger Federer’s era-sundering victory in today’s Wimbledon final is deciding in what order to sprinkle his latest assortment of … Continue reading
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Curious Meteorological Phenomena
Wimbledon, Semifinals (4) Murray d. (5) Tsonga, 6/3 6/4 3/6 7/5 It was raining when the first of the Wimbledon semifinals commenced, a curious meteorological phenomenon that saw the tournament organisers make the unprecedented decision of closing the roof before … Continue reading
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Making Omelettes
Wimbledon, Semifinal (3) Federer d. (1) Djokovic, 6/3 3/6 6/4 6/3 The verdict is in. Sunday’s men’s final at Wimbledon will be nothing short of epoch-shattering. The statistics prove it. This is troubling news for those who remain quaintly attached … Continue reading
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Temazepam Tuesday
Wimbledon, Day Eight (7) Ferrer d. (9) del Potro, 6/3 6/2 6/3 Less than twenty-four hours after Mikhail Youzhny realised his secret lifelong goal of reaching the quarterfinal stage at all four majors – the fact that he has previously … Continue reading
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Unnamed Monday
Wimbledon, Day Seven Of the 128 men who more or less randomly populated the Wimbledon men’s singles draw on the tournament’s opening morning, fully 112 failed to last the week. They have since joined forces with the roughly three billion … Continue reading
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Top Shelf Trogglehumpers
Wimbledon, Days Four and Five The BFG was getting more distressed every moment. ‘Oh bash my eyebones!’ he cried, waving the jar in the air. ‘I come all this way to get lovely golden dreams and what is I catching?’ … Continue reading
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A Visit To The World of Tennis
Wimbledon, Day Three Channel Seven’s broadcast of the 2012 Wimbledon Championships was last night as curiously free of John Newcombe’s presence as the singles draw is of Australian men. These two phenomena are not unrelated. Indeed, one presumes that this … Continue reading
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Good News and Bad
Wimbledon, Day One Gulbis d. (7) Berdych, 7/6 7/6 7/6 ‘Some have pointed to Berdych v Gulbis, leaving one to wonder just how long the Latvian has to underperform before he isn’t considered a threat.’ During the course of a … Continue reading
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Luck of the Draw: Wimbledon 2012
The latest research in draw analysis theory has identified five discernible stages that a zealous tennis fan moves through when the draw to a Grand Slam tournament is released, which happened amidst moderate fanfare earlier today at Wimbledon. Draw analysis … Continue reading
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The Sun King
French Open, Day 16 (2) Nadal d. (1) Djokovic, 6/4 6/3 2/6 7/5 Rafael Nadal has won Roland Garros for the seventh time, which is the most times anyone has ever done it. There is presumably no one interested in … Continue reading
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